( velvet is the flooring of hell )

I never fall onto my knees to the ground below me

never for a boy

or never for any god-like creature above me.

never to ask for repentance on my sins

and never to plead guilty or to lie again.

never to leave what is mine,

with the hopes of it coming back later by itself.

but now that the floor is made out of violet;

first quality, pure 100% velvet

that god himself walked on.

I want to fall.

I want to fall,

not like how a feather does on a windy afternoon

but rather to fall hard to the ground as if 

I had just went through my biggest mistake.

As if I were

just now

an atrocity to god,

falling to the deepest pits of hell as my punishment.

Today I wish to fall onto my knees

and to do everything I repented for.

To leave.